Tag: Humor

Getting All Shirty

When I first created this blog, I didn’t work for Apple, and Mac OS X 10.4’s codename, “Tiger,” hadn’t yet been announced.

So when it was, I prided myself on being ahead of the curve. Perhaps…evening inventing the curve?

Now, at WWDC, my prescience has once again been demonstrated for all the world to see:

Very orange t-shirt with white WWDC2005 text

Apple even borrows my blog background for such important things as its engineering shirt color.

Next thing you know, they’ll have an application called “Help”….

Yoo-Hoo!

There’s been a lot of press recently about Apple announcing a switch to Intel chips at WWDC tomorrow.

Just like in my last pre-conference post, I have a bit of information that may not have come your way yet. So here goes:

Per my sources, Apple is going to be relying on Intel in a big, new way. Where all the other so-called “news” sources get it wrong however, is in what Apple will be licensing from Intel:

Industrial design.

One source says, “We’ve really taken a pounding in the press for our crappy cases. Steve Jobs took one look at this and was on the phone immediately.”

When pressed further about the advantages of such a design, the source said, “Well, it’s, um, gray. And it has a big white button! We would never have thought of that.”

There you have it.

Update: Problems with the link, so here’s another link.

Psst!

I wasn’t supposed to make this public, but…I can’t help myself. It’s just too exciting.

The rumor about a headless iMac are in the right ballpark, but they go in the wrong direction.

Instead of a headless iMac, what Apple will announce at MacWorld San Francisco in a few days is a two-headed iMac.

It will be called the iMac Zaphod Beeblebrox Special Edition, and instead of the normal iMac silver and white colors, it will be black with green trim. It will be bundled with all seven Audible.com Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy titles, the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy text adventure game from Infocom, and two tickets to the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy upcoming movie.

Instead of the usual startup sound, whenever you turn on an iMac Zaphod Beeblebrox Special Edition, you will hear a cheery voice say, “Don’t Panic!”

Oh, and they got the price wrong, too.

Instead of retailing for five hundred dollars, this special computer will sell for five thousand dollars. I can’t guarantee I have this completely correct, but from what I hear, they figured that anyone who is excited by the above specifications is probably not from this planet anyway, and would be a bit fuzzy on the earthly exchange rate.

You heard it here first!